Category Archives: The Journey

Daily life and thoughts of a wayfarer

Doom and glory

Is it really necessary to be so conscious about life? Where does wonder set in if I am constantly thinking about what is happening in my life and considering what the meaning of that is happening while hoping to take … Continue reading

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no more letting go

Please, don’t ask for more to let go of I don’t have anything else to give and whatever I still ’own’ please let me have them just a little longer You can take all my burdens You can take all … Continue reading

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The taxi man

He arrived, opened the boot of the car. I asked if he was the taxi-man. He did not get it. Then I said it – You are the taxi driver, aren’t you?. He said yes and approached me for my … Continue reading

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Hu-Man

There are the moments when I realize that I am a Hu-Man being and that God is ever present in my life, somewhere in there, wrapped up in the most unexpected ‘places’ waiting to be experienced.

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Saved

I am having EXPERIENCES again! Overweight charges on top of the luggage price. It is just sooooo UNFAIR! And hey, the sweetest thing about the whole nightmare experience of a ruthless official was my encounter with another official, a security … Continue reading

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My many different faces

Today I am a beautiful woman. I feel desired and the mirror likes me. When I am like this I know I can get what I want through being desirous. I tempt my pray into my huge spider web and … Continue reading

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En-lighten-ment

Enlightenment is being in light and being in the process of becoming ‘light’ (in all sense of the world) – ik

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Come on! Disobey me!

You drive me crazy with your obedience. Why don’t you say NO to me? At least once? Why don’t you disobey me? Tell me I am wrong; that you don’t agree; that I shouldn’t do it that way because it … Continue reading

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An ‘I know it all!’ morning

It is so silly! Why would want to do it that way? It makes no sense! Let me tell you how it is done properly. Oh dear, life is not meant to be lived that way. Let me explain you! … Continue reading

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Why?

Why do you hate the one that holds the light for you to see?

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Noise

When in silence one notices the constant chatter of the mind that is voiced during chatter – aimless and meaningless stream of words trying to appear in a context. (ik)

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Appearances

The couple arrived. Young and quirky. Self-confident and successful. They know what they want. They can relate to the world and fit in. They are everything I am not – of this world: sorted, jobs, life, car, the house, the … Continue reading

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Illness or opportunity?

Too much illness! Too much thinking about illness and focus on related issues like fundraising. Instead of looking beyond the illness itself – what does it present me with? What options or learning are there in there for me? What … Continue reading

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What would you give in return?

It is not your time! Hold back! Try and fit in! Worry if what you do is good enough! Think hard – is there anything else you could do to make it better, to ease the craze? Hide away! Become … Continue reading

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The visit

Her house is in the prairie. Or in the woods more like. Surrounded by acres of woods, well mowed lawn and a lake. A huge house empty, waiting to be filled with joy and laughter again – as it used … Continue reading

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I said my good-byes

Today I remembered the funeral again … The tears, that were running down my face as I was looking at the casket of the man I had never met inhis life, were clearing my soul. Still he looked all so … Continue reading

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Half-closed eyes

In constant fight with the world; with one person, with the system whatever the inner tension meets. Built up insecurities hunt the tired mind to take control and put this messed up world right. In vain. Exhaustion takes the places … Continue reading

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L.A.F.

Observing what there is Being OK with what others think or do See what the situation has on offer for me Taking the offering Letting be Staying still Walking on water

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Shut down and functional vs sunbeams

As soon as I hit the doors of the lower world, verily it makes sure I have an impact. I immediately start to shut down. I can’t maintain my openness, kindness, joyfulness any more. Fear sets in. Fear of being … Continue reading

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Manic

No time for living but functioning Quick reactions to apparent impulses Hurt to hurt, ashes to ashes All make sacrifices for one another This time they care for one another so deeply that the connection becomes a heavy chain Manic … Continue reading

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the blind

Painfully blind the one that only sees that his mind commands him Forever contented is the one – when the mind is blind, the Eye sees the Universe in its full glory (ik)

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Stand Still

It is basically manic – frantic, or both. I am hiding behind work that I don’t have. I pretend that I have a lot to do because my surrounding is always busy. Manic and frantic. Not manic would mean they … Continue reading

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Loners

Loners don’t take the time to be with others. They go about their own business all the time, not noticing the chances that pass by connecting with others, learning from them, sharing with them – leaving their marks on the … Continue reading

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I wonder

I have been wondering what it is I am looking for; what kind of a life I wish to live if I had all the resources, skills, means that now I don’t think I have. So one of the the … Continue reading

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Some thoughts on healing and changing

I am realizing that though I wish I could think more, analyze more, discover more – there is nothing to think about, to discover or analyze. One needs to move upwards with the streams … What is down here in … Continue reading

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The land of the F – from Freedom to Fear (personal observation)

15 years ago America was the land of the Free. I came here to see how it is done: a mixture of self-confidence and the attitude of ’I can make it happen’. And it was true especially for big city … Continue reading

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In my ruins

I wonder what happened. Everything went so well up until a week ago. I felt so contented and happy and suddenly it went all out the window without saying good-bye. By the end of the week I had muscle spasms … Continue reading

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About the boy

swearing and kicking he demands, the boy, what he (thinks he) wants the world so far has offered him little of his desires but mostly needles to fear his world is insecure, scary and uncontrollable so he grabs each and … Continue reading

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On the way to freedom

I don’t even know what I am looking at. I am busy with participating. Still doing my best to see what is happening. I am here to give them something and I hope I am doing well. I know now … Continue reading

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Inside-out

I would like to write about how the inner experiences of meditation affects the outer. Not as if it changes the outer but rather it makes me see the other differently. I don’t believe in enlightenment. But I believe in … Continue reading

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A few weeks later

Two and half weeks down the road all seems little blurry and funny. I spent all this time so far in Fort Wayne, Indiana. An amazing ‘little’ city on the border of Ohio and Indiana. Population is around 250 thousand … Continue reading

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The start

I am in Fort Wayne, Indiana at the moment enjoying my time with beautiful people with whom we walk the same Path but having different experiences as we are going along. I am taking part in workshops and events and … Continue reading

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