Peace of mind by non-participation

What to fast on this Lenten Season?

Lent stared early this year. I just made my new year’s resolutions then, suddenly, it is the day of Epiphany asking me to meditate on what spiritual focus I want to hold for myself to this year. And here we are again, another season of contemplation: The Lenten Season. This time we are asked to release something that does not work for us anymore.

Since Ash Wednesday, I have contemplated on what to sacrifice on the altar of purification. Well, I can name quite a few things that do not work for me anymore. I wish to release, for example, my angry disposition, my vexing nature, my impatience, my defensiveness, my inability to forgive, my obligations and put it all behind me. However, I am also aware that my life does not revolve around this wish list; I am on God’s timing. Letting go is when He says “It is time!”

So, if there is nothing I can let go of, what is it that I could possible gain by observing the Lantern Season?

This morning, in my meditation, I was on the land of the ‘furies’. I was spinning around as the angry and upsetting thoughts like darts were being thrown at me. I manically tried to shield myself away from my own violet thoughts … but I could not protect myself from them.  Then I launched myself into defense mode but the situation only got more heated. Obviously, defense creates violence.

Eventually, I gave up defending myself from my own aggravated self and stopped blaming. I took a big breath, I stepped back from the ‘action’ and moved to a place of relative peace. I still felt the heat of the fury all around me but I was not participating in it any more.

My gentle focus for the Lent is ‘non participation’ and ‘moving into a place of peacefulness’ guided by the Breath, as often as I possibly can.

What is your focus for Lent? Is there something you are ready to let go of?