To sum it up

Though I am scared of vanishing
I am also hoping that this ends here
Because there is not much more of this I can bear
Not as if I am not grateful that I got this chance
– That I may have blown, anyway –
Still it has not gone as it has been anticipated
Without comparing this to any other one
I must admit
It has been challenging – without a moment of lapse
There were times I call a gift
To remember only the good
However, my greatest regret is that
I have allowed my circumstances
To spoil all the fun.